When turkeys attack

In an hour or so, we'll get in the car and drive to my sister's house. We'll laugh. We'll eat. We'll make fun of each other and talk about old times.

Like when we were all at home and somehow ended up with an attack turkey. It was a huge old Tom. I don't know why he was so mean, where he came from and if we ever ate him, but he was terrifying.

If you've never had a turkey chase you to the outhouse in the dead of the night, you haven't lived. Or had your bladder control tested.

Too much insight into my psyche on a national holiday? Sorry. Not sorry.

Our upbringing was one long lesson in the old adage, "That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger." I was the youngest, so I missed some of the more bucolic of our family times, but I'm sure I'll be reminded today. 

We won't be at my family home. It and the outhouse is gone now. The only turkey at Donna's will be on a platter, but if past gatherings are any indication, we'll serve up memories of that enduring life lesson and how our truly devout dad tended to laugh at things that other parents might find alarming. Like:

• When I'd snatched Nancy's 10-speed and was riding down the country road in front of our house and a snarling dog chased me into an electric fence. He was down at the neighbor's house when it happened. They both watched the scene play out. As the dog ran back home, the neighbor asked my dad if they should go untangle me. My dad shook his head no and probably said something about me needing to build up a little more character.
• When my parents' friends were over and the wife was in bathroom when a water pump sprang into action. It was a normal sound for those of us who lived there. Carmen Boyd, however, came from the city. Pants around her ankles, she jumped from the toilet to the ceiling and called for help thinking a wild animal was in there with her.
• When Donna failed to come to dinner for what seemed like hours, only to drag herself inside, wet and cold. She'd fallen into a well while she was out watering the cows and had to drag herself out of there.
• When Diane was dressed for a date and fell into the muddy pig pen.
• When he caught my brothers with smokeless tobacco and made them eat it. Donnie swallowed it and sat there defiant. David had a harder time and Dad let him mix it in with what was left of the gravy.

Sigh. How those were good times, I can't quite explain. I'll have to gather more proof.

Hope your Thanksgiving is full of laughter and safe travels.